The birth of a Bridge

I can still vaguely remember when I found out that one of my best friends was going to become a dad. My girlfriend at the time, I don't know whatever happened to her, was driving us to the bowling alley to meet up with our oddball gaggle of friends. We were going up H Street when he just suddenly blurts out that his girlfriend is pregnant. My girlfriend, I think her name was Lynn or Ange, started asking the typical girl questions like "How many months is she?", "What are you two going to do?", "Have you told your parents?" yadda yadda yadda. My reaction was more like, "HOLY SHIT!!! She let you touch her vajayjay with your peenie outside of the wrapper? Was she drunk? Wait a minute...you had sex?" or something like that. Actually, my reaction was probably more like that of my girlfriend's, but rest assured I was thinking other things, some of which haunt me to this day, but I digress. Suffice to say, he was scared out of his mind and I'm sure he soiled his pants and the back seat of my girl's car.

Flash forward to November 6, 1999 and I'm hanging out in the waiting area at Mary Birch Hospital with my still girlfriend and our friends. Scratch that, they weren't friends anymore, they were family. If you are still hanging out with the people you knew since middle school, heck some of them knew each other since elementary, and you're waiting for hours while one of you is expecting their first kid you stop being friends and automatically become family. Sure as time goes on you might not hang out with each other as much as you used to, life has a habit of getting in the way, but you're still there for each other when the big moments happen, good or bad, and that is something that has always defined my group of friends. No matter what, we would always be there for each other and that love would extend to each other's children as well.

So finally, after god knows how long our friend comes out, tears still fresh on his face, to let us know that his wife, yes they got married a month earlier and yes he cried at that too, puss; delivered a beautiful baby girl. Everyone cheered, hugged, patted him on the back, congratulated him, and happily went to visit the new little bundle of joy and the exhausted wife. And there they were the new little family, tired, a little scared and overwhelmed, but relieved that it was all over and knowing that everything was going to be all right because they had the most important thing in the world. The love and support of family.

So I would like to take this moment to wish Bridget a happy tenth birthday. I hope your parents get you some new glasses and just know that the real reason they call you "Bridge" is because you were conceived under a bridge, most likely the Coronado Bridge, while listening to the Red Hot Chili Peppers. Yes, your parents were freaks back in the day, and they loved you very, very much for two years until your little sister Cadyn came along. Now they just tolerate you. I hope you had an adequate birthday.

Love always,

Druncle Bert

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